I might piss you off with this post.
Right now, you believe hundreds of things that aren’t true.
Every day. Every single frickin’ day, you and me are hanging onto beliefs that aren’t true.
Does that rock your world?
Think about it. How often do you come across something you’re thinking (usually about yourself or a person in your life) and you say about it, “I know it’s not true, but it FEELS so true”?
Here’s a list of some beliefs you might recognize:
- I’m never gonna get this right (about whatever – relationships, career, money, etc.).
- There aren’t any good (single men, single women, jobs, etc.) out there.
- I’m a bad person.
- I’ll never be good enough.
- I can never do anything right…I always get everything wrong.
- I’m ugly.
- I need (him/her/them/my partner/my parents/my children) to love me. I need them to treat me better. I need them to respect me.
These beliefs cause us suffering. If you don’t believe me, just pick one of your juicy ones, and purposely think it for a minute and see what it’s doing to you. Does the belief make your stomach knot up? Does your heart race? Do you internally lash out at the other person? Do you feel weak? Want to hide? See? — it’s causing you suffering just to think that belief.
But what if…just what if…when a belief is causing you suffering it’s actually because IT ISN’T TRUE FOR YOU???
Yeah, I know: it’s hard to get your head around that idea. But play with me for a minute. Let’s say you’re holding the belief, “I’m ugly,” but you can say, “I know it isn’t true, but it FEELS so true.” And let’s say that belief is causing you a lot of suffering. But that belief is pretty arbitrary, right? I mean, isn’t it just as likely that it’s true that you’re not ugly? Or that you’re beautiful? In fact, you’ve already told me know you it’s not true even though it feels true. But despite knowing it’s not true, you’re choosing to hang onto a belief you can’t prove one way or the other, or that you already know isn’t true. Weird, huh?
So what if…just by chance…the belief that brings you joy, peace, bubbliness, and a sense of connection with yourself and others…what if THAT belief is true? WHAT IF THE TRUTH IS ACTUALLY THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT YOU’VE BEEN BELIEVING?
Intrigued? I want to offer you a resource: the amazing author and teacher named Byron Katie. (She goes by Katie in person.) Do you know that there are a few enlightened people who are alive today who don’t believe their thoughts are true? Byron Katie is one of them. After many difficult years and a lot of desperation, she woke up one morning and couldn’t believe her thoughts were true. And she found herself to be free. And she created a way to help the rest of us become free.
When I coach clients 1-on-1, we look in depth at the beliefs that are causing them suffering. We ask if those beliefs are true. We find opposite beliefs that are more true. And the amazing thing is that when we find a belief that is more true, the original belief loses its power.
Sometimes it feels like magic.
Want to know more? Curious about being coached?
- Email me at cynthia [at] MagicCarpetLifeCoaching [dot] com
- “Loving What Is,” by Byron Katie – if you want to read one of her books, start with this one.
- You can watch Byron Katie coach people about all sorts of painful beliefs on YouTube.Just search on her name. Here are a couple good ones: